Is preschool good for moms?

It occurred to me as I dropped my preschooler off today that I'm the first generation of mothers to have my kids start school so young. My mother had a two-morning, two-hour program, which was then called the politically incorrect "Mother's Day Out." And, as a tangent, I never understood that name. Two hours does not give a mom a day out. It gives her time to shower and eat breakfast.

But back to preschool. My daughter goes for four hours, three times a week. That gives me a whopping twelve hours of professional time. I can increase that to six hours five days a week, which would allow me to work pretty much full time. But here's a question: Is that a good idea? I'm beginning to think the whole reason some women decide to go back to work at least past time is because of the social push to put kids in preschool. If I had my daughter home with me, I don't think I'd feel as obligated to accept as many (or maybe any) freelance assignments.

Now, I think preschool is a wonderful invention. I love that my child is learning at this point in her life when she's excited and willing to soak up information. I also love the fact she's learning to share and understand the complexities of interpersonal relationships.

But I wonder if preschool is healthy for mothers who then feel the pressure to DO something with their time. Up until 40 years ago, handling the household budget and keeping the house, kids and dog clean was considered a full time position.

What's your point of view? Should we feel the need to immediately find work as soon as there is a break in our childcare duties?

Two incomes just to pay for preschoolers' actitivies?!

Seriously, that's ridiculous. I live in a pretty expensive place. Coming from cheap ol' Texas, the cost of everything from groceries to dance class was shocking. I mean, blow my mind shocking.

It's no wonder most families need dual incomes. How can you afford $500- plus per month on preschool? Oh, and that's just until 1 p.m., thank you very much. Back in Texas, my daughter was in a three-day program, 8:30 a.m. until 2:30 p.m., with an additional dance class for $180 a month. That was affordable. Parents knew their children were in a safe, wholesome environment, learning social skills while mom (or dad) could grocery shop and go to the doctor before pick-up time. The schools here are all fabulous (so the literature says). But I understand why more parents are opting for the school-run 3-hour, four-day-a-week option. That's free and it's worth the hassle of running through the grocery store when you can save thousands of dollars per year. Just forget any mom-only time. That luxury is too expensive. And what about those parents who work as garbage collectors or janitors? We need those services desperately. Yet, we don't pay many of those workers a wage high enough to afford one extracurricular for their kids. Talk about a gap between the haves and have-nots.

My sister-in-law just moved from - you guessed it- Texas to Washington state. Her son's preschool is hundreds of dollars a month for two-and-a-half hours twice a week. What happened to Mother's Day Out? You remember that from when you were a kid? Your mom dropped you off for a few hours with a bunch of snotty, mean-spirited kids so that she could run to the bank, get a hair cut, try to exercise and all those other adult things without a whiny kid clinging to her leg? What happened to that option?

Unless you've already mapped out little Jimmy's course from that exclusive preschool to (insert Ivy League school name here), you don't want to go into debt for socializing out kids. Or quit putting money into a retirement fund. Can't there be an option in the middle?