Life before kids

Did you have one?

I know I did. I just don't remember it. Somewhere between the time I graduated from college and took my first job, I had a lifetime of fun before the baby bug bit. Hard.

When I decided I was ready for a baby I was insatiable. I bugged my spouse mercilessly. Admittedly, we'd been married already for six years, but I'm like a dog with a bone. Determined.

Looking back, I can't remember what I did after work. I remember thinking how weird it was that I didn't have to study. I even remember late nights at the office and bringing work home. One memorial day I was even called into the office to proof something.

But frankly, it's scary, I hope I remember more about my years at home with the kids then I do about the years before they came.

Reading Votes for Women

This former managing editor targets exactly how it feels to want a career and home life.

Out of focus

I do everything in two to three minute movements, so I rarely feel focused on one task. I'm often working to a symphony of, "Mommy, can I have a glass of water?" and the primitive grunts and leg tugging of my one year old.

So things don't always get done the way they should. The water bill gets missed in the stack of junk mail and I sheepishly discover it a few days later when I'm stacking the magazines I subscribe to but never get a chance to read. The laundry gets stacked but I don't notice the stack of folded socks until I sit on them. And if it doesn't make it on the calendar, it doesn't happen.

I like to blame it on constant distractions from my two little whirling dervishes. And I sometimes remember with great fondness the long stretches of quiet thinking time I used to enjoy at work when I shut my office door.

Still, I'd rather be getting some done with my two little distractions than checking off everything on my list while someone else gets cuddles from my babies.

Fight or flight

I've got a buzz going and it's not from coffee this morning. I haven't had a drop ... yet. It's that extra boost of energy you get when your plate is so full there's no time for anything else.

Have you ever had that tingly sensation and been stymied? You have a ton to do but the stars don't align? In my case, I'm praying for good kiddie karma today. Long naps, happy play next to me while I'm working on projects. Then, as soon as I'm finished, some fantastically fun adventure. Got any suggestions?

But first, about that coffee ...

Work and kids; the new oil and water

It's really hard to get any freelance work done when you're watching a couple of little ones. And, in theory, I'd really rather not. What I mean is, I want it all. Great playtime with the kids, a compartmentalized work time, and adult time with my husband.

Life's a little bit messier than that.

So here are a few tips to get stuff done when you can't keep all of the elements of your life so separate.

1. Play Doh. My almost four year old loves to create while he sits next to me at the dining room table. My infant cruises around us and plays with various toys in her orbit while my computer stays safely out of reach.

2. Indoor play areas. My favorite is the one at McDonald's, because I can get a coffee while he's running. My baby sits in the high chair and nibbles on munchies or in my baby sling, and I can edit on paper.

3. Tall furniture. In a pinch, I'll place my computer on the DVD shelf in the family room and compute while my kids play toys around me.

The nice part of all of this is that it avoids extra TV time or computer time, and the kids still feel like I'm present, even when they don't have my full attention.

Get it together, Part 1

One of the most difficult elements of a home business for me is getting organized. I really LOVE to put my folders together, to label them carefully with assignments, and print out my notes. For me, it's an inescapable part of the process.

I've written before about the importance of a separate work space. It's an idea I'm committed to, but I haven't yet managed to completely follow through. So, for me at least, this July is my "Get Organized" month. With five projects in the works right now--and the promise of more any day--it's really crunch time. No way I'm gonna survive if I don't do this, like, now.

Here's what I'm doing to get started:

1. Planning regular babysitting time for 2-3 hours at least once a week.
2. Setting daily goals--just as I did when I worked in an office full-time.
3. Recycling the leftovers from completed assignments to star fresh.

Want to try it with me?

Seize the moment

I'm almost embarrassed by the number of pens I found in my couch yesterday. It's just one more sign of my addiction to the written word. I feel naked without a pen on me, and the office supply store is a virtual nirvana of products that tickle my fancy.

I often carry a pen and notebook with me to capture stray thoughts, record shopping lists, and preserve the ideas that won't survive in my overfull brain until I get home. I've even been known to use the backs of old grocery store receipts and other odds and ends. Because when you've got to write something down, the urgency is akin to drinking a gallon of Kool-aid with no bathroom in sight. It's that bad.

The pens in my couch are also a symbol of something else. With so few minutes in the day, I find I have to keep my pens handy so I can catch a five-minute writing opportunity or 15 minutes of editing a freelance assignment while the kids contentedly play with toys on the family room floor.

I used to be preoccupied with the idea of getting these large blocks of time to work. To me, that seemed the only way to really accomplish anything meaningful. Until I realized I'd be an empty nester before those moments ever miraculously materialize. Sure, it's important to make time. The hubby gets that I need planned time to work--usually in blocks of time of at least two hours--and God Bless the babysitter. BUT those five and 10 minute blocks during the day can also add up, and I feel a lot more productive when I'm using them.

It was the same principle I practiced when I was working in the office full time. I'd steal that 15 minutes before the office opened or the 45 minutes over lunch to write, edit, and generally get creative.

So today, I'm going to seize my opportunities. I'm going to:

1. Keep my pen and notebook handy
2. Plan some solo time for freelance work
3. Keep the chocolate handy for inspiration (I personally love Lindt truffles, Dove chocolates, and the Hershey's Symphony bars with toffee and almonds)

What will you do for yourself today?

Working at home rules

You see the signs everywhere. Plastered along the roadside, taped to light poles, and even on cars. "Work at home." Sounds great, doesn't it? Perhaps.

It's definitely a great opportunity if you can find something you love doing and do it from home ... if it helps you create a better life balance. As a freelancer, I have more control over the assignments I take, and I choose my own work hours. But there is a downside. A big one.

First, consider you're never really out of the office. I haven't taken a vacation in a year where I wasn't working on something for a client in from some exotic locale. This means I'm breaking even with my office position, because I was never able to completely separate myself from the business, even when I was away.

You're also subject to the whim of fate. Clients fall on rough times. Advertising dollars drop. People stop buying the widgets you're paid to develop. In the corporate world, you might end up laid off. In the freelance business, the phone stops ringing.

But I think one of the biggest challenges is simply creating the structure to make your at-home business work. Do you need to keep regular, if shortened, business hours by the phone? Have to planned a certain amount of time each week that will be your work time without outside responsibilities (watching kids, cleaning house, etc.)? Is there someone else in the family who brings in a steady paycheck (and health insurance) to keep the finances steady? (This isn't necessary, but it does offer more stability.)

I think you have to be more organized, more dedicated, and possess a spirit of planning to make working at home work for you. After all, there are a lot more distractions when you're working from your nest. And there are many advantages that make it worthwhile if you can commit yourself. On the good days, I think there's nothing else in life I'd rather be doing.

One final note: I know some people who work for a company from home on one or more days a week. This is also a great opportunity, but I still think you must follow the rules and keep a separate work space from the hubbub of the household.

Today, I'm going to offer myself these three gifts:
1. Create a dedicated work space
2. Work in some "me" time
3. Plan 30 minutes to evaluate my business goals

What will you do for yourself today?