What can sex do for you?

According to this CNN article, quite a lot. Be calmer and look younger. Reduce heart disease! Part of me thinks it's simply men reporting to get mire sex. But then I think if I start sleeping more, drinking a small glass of red wine, eating one ounce of dark chocolate and having sex three times a week...well, maybe I would feel better. If only I weren't too tired to try.

Those $#%! hormones!

We did it. We had another baby. That's three - three for me! But my hormones this go-round were out of control.
The worst part for me was the tiredness, which led to depression. I've never been depressed before, and I have to admit that I was scared. Those feelings can be completely overwhelming.

I wondered if anyone of you had this problem. Are you willing to share you stories?

Yahoo article on medical overtreatment

I can't say that I was shocked by the numbers in this article. What does leave me aghast is the fact that so many people are undergoing painful treatments that do not prolong life but incur incredibly large debts. I can't say how I'd react in this situation: I think I'd want to explore every option to save my husband and kids, but would I want them to do the same for me? I can't be so sure. I don't like the idea of leaving my family with massive debt. And I probably want to have some peace and comfort in my last days on earth -- to spend with those I love.

Articles like these shows the need for better education. If Americans were well-versed on their choices I think the ratios listed might be very different.

Mental health

Having children is a huge physiological step for most parents. Not only does a woman's body change to accommodate the baby, parents need to prepare for the mental challenges of kids. And they can be daunting: with every child you are adding a new personality to the family. An unknown personality that needs constant attention and love (as will any other children you currently have).

But there really isn't much written about parents' prenatal mental health. If you consider Planned Parenthood's numbers that up to half of all pregnancies in the United States are not planned, well, is it any wonder that the soon-to-be-parents are not mentally prepared for the upcoming challenges? This is an area where we need more research and more resources. If moms- and dads-to-be are not mentally healthy at the time of their child's birth, then how can we expect the new family to get off to the best start possible?

Summer time blues

It's started. The kids have been home all of a few days, and today they plaintively wailed, "I'm bored!"

My retort was, "Who can change that?"

Perhaps it wasn't the most sympathetic answer, but I do believe my kids need to take more responsibility for their time and actions. I know they can't drive themselves to the pool, but they can play with one of the gagillion toys they HAD to have. Or they can read a book, play in the sand box, on the play structure, draw, color, make a collage...you get my point. There's always something they could be doing; they just expect me to make it more entertaining.

But I was on deadline. I literally had to finish my project. It's a combustible combination. I get stressed, they get annoyed, and all hell breaks loose. But it doesn't have to be that way. Which is why I sent them outside to play. The connection with nature is imperative to both their mental and physical health. Of course it'll only last about another 15 minutes, but that's more than enough time to finish this blog post.

Now if I could just get to the vacuuming....

Frankly, Scarlett, I don't give a damn.

I've been saying something to that effect now for the past few months. Not because I don't actually care. I do. Really. I simply don't have the energy to continue.

Ever been there? Portia's last column was on sleep - or the lack thereof. That's been one of the problems. When you don't sleep well - at all - everything else seems to be in a haze. And it's hard to care about fog.

Still, relationships need to be maintained. The only other alternative is to let them collapse. Because I happen to love my children, I don't want that to happen. So it's time to start making an effort. Big time.

What's your sleep routine?

I'm not an insomniac, but I could be. I bet you feel that way sometimes too. And there's a very simple explanation.

We don't maintain healthy sleep hygiene.

I know, funny word. But my dad's a therapist, and it's really called that.

Now, if you're a mom, you've spent a little bit of time investing in your child's sleep habits. Our routine takes anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour, depending on the night. It's a slow easing in to a restful night, and the payoff has been great. My family is so pleased to watch the kids and always compliments us on how good they are for bedtime.

I wish they could say the same for me. I can be utterly, completely physically exhausted and my mind races. Did I remember to dot the i and cross the t? Did I word this e-mail appropriately? Wouldn't that be a great headline for my next article?

So I talked to my dad. He reminded me of an important fact: Beds are for for two things—sleeping and ... well, let's just call it couple time.

I'm going to share his advice, because it makes such a difference in my life. You need a routine, just like your kids. The last hour of your day should be spent on non-intellectual activities. (Books are still OK, as long as you don't read in bed and it's reading for fun.)

Give yourself a break. Sleeping makes you a happier, healthier, smarter person. Routine might sound boring, but sometimes boring is beautiful.